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Agwambo is bae

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Say what you will about Kisumu ๐Ÿ™‚

Talk about the abusive relationship it has with its people. How Kisumuans beat it down, walk all over it, render it business unusual and leave it for dead when they donโ€™t agree on certain things. Talk about the ego of Kisumu. Bigger than the waters of the earth. Its women with derrieres and bosoms that deserve a city of their own. The kind that make you close to certain that we might be looking for Eurobond funds in the wrong places.

Kisumu has a lot to talk about, but the one thing we refuse to acknowledge is the loyalty of Kisumuans.

The world will not know peace until we applaud the indelible commitment to one man that they all are married to. Large scale polygamy and polyandry basically.

In Kisumu, thereโ€™s no such thing as political ideologies.

These people speak one political language. In harmony and a synchrony that is unmatched and clearly indubitable. Theirs is ineradicable devoutness to a single political agenda. Their discourse is shaped and morphed in one man. One man and one man alone.

His word is law and in their eyes he can do no wrong.

raila-odinga-nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn2His words are holy in Kisumu. And he knows it. Because he has seen it. He has felt it. He has witnessed it and itโ€™s the reason he can sleep with a curve on his face. Because in Kisumu, he can make a call and the earth will move. This man is a god. Kisumu has given him such reverence that without mention, a boy in a tiny village in Katwekera knows who Iโ€™m talking about. When a people cheer when you take a sneeze ladies and gentlemen, you know you can surrender to God.

In time when loyalty is as rare an attribute as the truth in media, Kisumuans epitomize this word to the last letter. Raila doesnโ€™t campaign in Kisumu. He visits Kisumu. They walk on the steps he left during his last visit, they breath a bit faster where he is so some of him is left in their lungs. They blink less in case they miss his slightest movement. They cheer at anything and everything Raila. I bet even his fart is recorded and has its place at the Jaramogi monument. When he says tendawili instead of kitendawili, Kiswahili scholars gather to change the Kisumu version of kamusi. It’s preposterous, maybe farcical, and perhaps ludicrous even. But it is consistent and steady and deeply entrenched and the world over we envy it.

Agwambo definitively controls the political scene here. He skypes the rules, tweets the way forward, facebooks the agenda and shares the physical progress on instagram and pinterest.Because in Kisumu he is that guy. Who has people downloading these apps in phones that cost them more that the government regulated form one fees. They adore him, they revere him. They want to be him, they are his squad and he is the master.

He is the king of this modern jungle. His roar thunders from the shores of Lake Victoria to the last sand drop at Rusinga Island. Here if you are not pro Raila,then you are pro Raila.The next time you move to Kisumu and that Raila T-Shirt is old and you turn it into your mop, donโ€™t mop during the day.Raila only kneels to God, why is he under your feet? You will not live to answer. Owada.

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