Upcoming Events

10:00 am Kisumu Junk Festival @ Jumuia Hotel
Kisumu Junk Festival @ Jumuia Hotel
Dec 23 @ 10:00 am โ€“ 6:00 pm
Kisumu Junk Festival @ Jumuia Hotel | Kisumu | Kenya
This is an aspirational and family friendly experience around junk food, live music, perfect weather and our social Masai market, art and music. For tickets/partnership/sponsor – 0727869367, Jay Dreamer
+254780168178 corporate@amazingkisumu.co.ke

Humour: Neil Oyoo, sorry Ne-Yo is in Kenya


Disregard that westernised Luo name, sijui NE-YO sijui NeYo woteva; The original name was Neil Oyoo, a guy from South Nyanza, Homabay county, Kanyipir sublocason. Neil Oyoo was a veteran orutu player who was in the same band with Oguta Olie Bobo. Infact If you have listened to Musa Juma you will hear “Oyoo daktari”.

It’s not that Oyoo was a doctor, noo! Every person with letter ‘O’ as the genesis of their name is a doctor by default, they only attend medical school for technical appearance. Neil Oyoo was famous for Luo love songs like “oloyo mon gi chiedo gi chiedo” etc. Oyoo was a bright student whose parents were not well off. The only thing his father was wealthy for was a bald head. The ratio of skin to hair on his father’s head was 10:1. In fact if you didn’t have a mirror you just had to visit Oyoo’s father and pay-per-view on his head.

If you observe Neil Oyoo, sorry Ne-Yo keenly, you will notice that he doesn’t put down his hat. He is always hiding the family inheritance that manifests boldly on his head.

Ati he has swag. Swag mar fecal matter?

When he had cleared his KCSE at Oriwo Boys Secondary, we did a harambee for him so that he could go to Harvard University and eventually work at the White House like his cousin. No sooner than he boarded Kenya Airways with our money, than he turned his back on us and even changed his name to kia NE-YO jus imagine!

Ati nowadays Neil Oyoo sings like mikayi Selina Odana (Celine Dion) or mosenindo Awiti nyar Yusto (Whitney Houston) while dancing like mosenindo Mikael Ojako (Michael Jackson).

Lakini yaawa, hii kijana najuwa kweli nyuma haitukanwi? Ye najuwa behind is not insulted? Now he is coming back without even informing us to build for him a lion. Where will he sleep? Will he chase sleep in the chest of the village? Will he chase sleep in his grandmother Nyar Sikari’s house? Tell that boy to eat his tomatoes! Sisi kama watu ya Kanyipir we will not beg car car sir pseudo!

I have said i have breathed.

Indeed, all the lost Luos in the diaspora are coming back home, Obama did so just last month ๐Ÿ™‚

Via Jaduong’ insideย (Facebook).

PS: Read about the great work he is set to do with other great African acts published in Up Nairobi

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